Make Love, Not War

You know, I’ve been hesitant to speak on anything related to the vaccine. Most of my friends know that I am not taking the vaccine. I have done extensive research (on both sides) and have come to the conclusion that it is not for me.


I am a thirty-one-year-old black woman who is capable of making my own decisions. My choice is not in any way influenced by my parents or family because I know family members (on my mom and dad’s side) who have gotten the shot and they are fine, still living their everyday lives.


The only reason I am even writing this is because I am absolutely appalled at the lack of tolerance and childlike pettiness I have seen from vaccinated individuals. I can’t speak for others but I am healthy. And I’m blessed because my father, mother as sister are as well.


I have always taken care of my body (pre-covid pandemic era) because being from San Francisco Bay Area (most millennial kids who had hippie parents will understand lol) you learn early on about healthy homeopathic ways to treat the body. Ever since I was a little girl my mother has always taken the natural way to treat my sister and I so what I am doing is nothing new to anyone who really knows me.


God has also blessed me with a career as a full-time educator and writer online that does not require me to be in-person and vaccinated so I understand those who took the vaccine for their own careers.


But back to the vax vs. the unvax.


In school, all I heard growing up was how it was important to respect others and their decisions.
In California especially I used to see Coexist and practice peace and tolerance all through the state.

If you choose to not get the vaccine you will not get any hate from me. But if you do get the vaccine you will not receive any hate from me. You did what was best for you and your life.
I don’t wish ill on any sides.

I am not writing this post to try and convince you to not get the shot. As a capable, educated adult (which most of my friends are on all my social media accounts 😊) you made the decision that was best for you based on the information that you compiled.

This is a safe space here. And I want both sides to know that you have a friend in me.
I love you all,

-Nikki

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. -Philippians 4:6-7 KJV

True Love


I was down today.

I didn’t have much to say.

In all actuality I had thoughts,

But I fear my truth will keep me caught.

So I pretend, and in a way become brought.

I stayed tied in knots.

I was at the point of depression.

Caught in the confession of my accession to my oppression,

When I received relief that came as a sweet, cool decompression,

I was in this wonderful feeling of refreshen.

My comfort comes in words.

In the feelings they bring.

Of that life-changing comfort that causes one to sing.

Such a perfect thing.

A kindred spirit is hard to find,

That is why I’m here to remind,

And make sure that you’ll be kind,

To my love affair,

That I’ll swear without fanfare,

With words.

There’s No Oxygen In The Room

No one understands me.
I’m pretending.

I’m not sure who I am.

I’m not sure you’ll like who you really see.

I’m not sure I can freely be me.

My heart hurts.

My chest burns.

I have no relief.

I can’t seem to see straight.

The weight of the world is on my shoulders.

I have no relief.

I can’t tell the truth.

It won’t set me free.

My body is tired.

I know no other option.

I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I don’t know what I hope to accomplish with this.

Maybe my pain can give someone else comfort.

A moment of bliss.

My truth is I cannot tell it.

I hate myself.

I hate my thoughts.

My wants, and desires, and hope,

It’s been stripped from me.

Yet I have to be strong.

Always strong.

I cry at night and in the dark.

So that in the day I’m light and full of false snark.

 

-NR

Juste Une Petite Catastrophe

I don’t like being torn.

I say yes, but I don’t mean it.

I say no, but eyes say otherwise.

It’s not fair.

Making you out to be a mind reader.

But it’s what I want.

I need for you to decide.

I need you to tell me otherwise.

Pouvez-vous voir ce que mon desir ardent pour moi me fait?

Say you’ll stay even when I scream at you to go.

Say yes even when I sound bitter and tell you no.

I’m a small disaster you see.

I don’t I’ll ever just be.

Donner et Prendre…

I looked up,

And you were there.

I tried to speak,

But you shook your head.

I stepped back.

You walked forward.

“I went too far,” you said.

“I took too much,” you pled.

“I should’ve tried,” you shouted.

I wanted to scream.

I wanted to fight.

Anything but feel this.

This burning in my chest.

This racing heart.

“I lost myself along the way with you,” I spoke quietly.

I walked forward.

You stepped back.

You tried to speak,

But I shook my head.

“No. It’s my turn to speak.”

-NR

A Cover…Ou un sale secret

Yeah, you read it correctly.

I’m only saying what other people are thinking.

Of what others are feeling.

What lies within all of us.

What we are afraid to let out.

What’s the worst that could happen?

It’s okay,

I’m like the rest of you.

I’m the coward that pretends to be appalled,

Secretly marveling at the tales being spun.

Does that make me a deviant?

Tu pourrais être rude c’est ce que je veux

Look at me.

An absolute mess because of my thoughts centering you.

-NR

An Unreal Request

My friends tell me I’m crazy about this dream I once had.
They all laugh and mock till my foolish heart bleeds,
For the love it truly needs.
I dreamt of a man,
who took my hand,
and told me I needn’t do much,
just get used to his touch.
How could I?
It was all elusive to me.
you see, love never came to me.
How could I just be?
Yet he whispered in my ear,
told me things that made me shiver,
that promised to deliver.
It felt so real that to this day,
I sit here waiting,
for my dream man.

Five-Star Reviews

So I’m Goodreads famous.

LOL.

For the past couple of weeks, I have been stressing about my book. Whether or not people will love it if it will sell successfully. I expected average reviews. 3-4 stars rating. But to get five? That is absolutely amazing! It’s been an adventure. And now that I’ve gotten my feet wet, I am writing furiously for my second novel. I think all the jitters and kinks have been worked out.

Also, if you guys are interested, click the link below and give the book a look-see.

I love you all,

-NR

http://amzn.to/2q6vsTY