Tag: tired

The Unthinkable

“I ain’t draft dodging. I ain’t burning no flag. I ain’t running to Canada. I’m staying right here. You want to send me to jail? Fine, you go right ahead. I’ve been in jail for 400 years. I could be there for 4 or 5 more, but I ain’t going no 10,000 miles to help murder and kill other poor people. If I want to die, I’ll die right here, right now, fightin’ you, if I want to die. You my enemy, not no Chinese, no Vietcong, no Japanese. You my opposer when I want freedom. You my opposer when I want justice. You my opposer when I want equality. Want me to go somewhere and fight for you? You won’t even stand up for me right here in America, for my rights and my religious beliefs. You won’t even stand up for my right here at home.” -Muhammad Ali

So I have some things to say.
Today in sunny northern california (Vacaville to be precise) my sister was driving towards the local grocery store. My mother sent her to pick up a couple of items. After dropping me off at the gym, she went on her journey to the store.

My sister later narrates that she saw a parking space near the front. So she turns on the signal, and drives to pull in the parking space. My sister stops the car, and calls out to the driver when he steps out of the car. She says, “Sir, did you not see that I was pulling in?” The older white man walks toward my sister and starts to yell at the top of his lungs. These are his words precisely;
“You nigger bitch! I can take what I want! What are you going to do about it Nigger Nigger Nigger!” My sister tells me that she is so shocked that she is staying in the car trying to calm down. Others are staring, and she is becoming more agitated and embarrassed. She comes home and tells my mother, father, and me what had happened.
Afterward she comes and sits by my side, and just keep shaking her head. She looks at me, and I know what she wants to say. I can see it in her eyes. They are saying why? Why would someone approach me like that?
People like to choke things up to road rage, people losing their temper, and saying things out of context.
But I’m not.
When I’m angry at a white person I don’t start yelling derogatory names like, “cracker,” or question your family lineage. So why should you do the same.
I’m sick. I’m sick and tired of hearing this still going on. I’m sick and tired of it being 2015, and people still think they have a right to talk to my younger sister that way. It gets old.
Real old.

-N

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A Serious Proposition To The Ladies

(If you’ve read Astell you catch my drift)

Dear Women,
I know that you feel tired. If you’re like me and you’ve just seen a bunch of rom-coms then you know what I’m talking about.
You’re looking for a man.
And not just any man, no the hero, the savior of dreams, the slayer of dragons, the one that loves to dance and can hold a tune. He’s supposed to make your knees quiver, He’s supposed to make you throw your head back in shameless abandon, and make you wanna say his name….
Sorry, just finished reading a Katheleen E. Woodiwiss book.You get what I’m saying?
The problem is, when this man comes about, at first he tends to need you, want you, may even say he loves you,
But does he really mean it? What about years down the road, when you are ready to have children, when you are ready to be the best soccer mom on the planet only to find that it was all a lie? Oh what to do? Well let me enlighten you.You see I’m tired. I’ve heard a lot and seen a lot. As you’ve read this past sentence you’re probably smirking thinking to yourself, “Now what has Nicole seen in her 24 years of life that would make her even close to a veteran?”
Ladies, you don’t know the half of it. Men say that we are controlled by our emotions; and that may be true 90% of the time. That however doesn’t excuse, nor condone the recent behavior men have exhibited to women. (Especially the behavior I have seen) Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not in any way bitter, or wishing the death of the male gender. But I want them to really see the damage that is being done to women by their own hands.
I’ve seen a woman, give up her whole life, give everything to a man just to find out that giving everything still isn’t good enough. I’ve seen a man have a woman work, provide, basically everything and be just quietly observing on the sideline.
I’ve seen a woman who wants to start the next chapter of her life, but can’t even move on because of false information.
Does any of this sound familiar to you?
On Lifetime, there is a movie coming out in a couple of weeks about three women, who are friends and vow to be married by the end of that year. While this journey is happening we see the friendship between the women, the ups and downs in their life along with the men who invade their minds, hearts, and bodies.
Now the movie had me at first; Just looking at the previews, hearing the Sia “Chandelier” song had me going. But the more I watched the more disturbed I became. Why should that be the goal? Why are women always written as wanting to get married, or have to be because of what other people think?
Now take Samantha from Sex and the City. Now that was a woman.
Someone who did what they wanted, whenever they wanted, and didn’t answer to anyone specifically no man. And the character created in part by a woman?
WHY SAY IT AIN’T SO!
What happened to her? That story came under backlash from men, and conservative women.(Who I think secretly wanted to screw just as Samantha did but who am I to say) Is a story only realistic if a woman character wants to get married and have babies, only to find out decades later that he didn’t want to marry you, didn’t really love you, you were a duty, or he’s been cheating on you the entire time?
Ladies, If you are like me then please help me do something about it! I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Ladies we’ve changed the world before, and we can do it again.

-N