Addiction

Les Abysses

I try to tell it to stay away sometimes,

And for a while It will listen.

Appalled at my behavior to be kind,

Listen to reason,

Try and see the other’s person’s growing season,

IT wants nothing to do with me.

But there are weeks when it comes back.

Past midnight IT whispers in my ear tempting me with sin and delight!

How I bite my lip and withhold my moans for fear of IT noticing and my thoughts take flight.

I try to-

I just need-

Force these positive thoughts in and-

Est-ce que ca me tuerait de vivre une nuit de depravation?

IT walks toward me bed,

hovering over my face.

I can smell the sweet scent of his breath and the allure of-

No one can know.

This secret I hold dear.

Else I won’t be seen how I should be.

Instead they’ll only know of what became of me.

-N


	

There’s No Oxygen In The Room

No one understands me.
I’m pretending.

I’m not sure who I am.

I’m not sure you’ll like who you really see.

I’m not sure I can freely be me.

My heart hurts.

My chest burns.

I have no relief.

I can’t seem to see straight.

The weight of the world is on my shoulders.

I have no relief.

I can’t tell the truth.

It won’t set me free.

My body is tired.

I know no other option.

I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I don’t know what I hope to accomplish with this.

Maybe my pain can give someone else comfort.

A moment of bliss.

My truth is I cannot tell it.

I hate myself.

I hate my thoughts.

My wants, and desires, and hope,

It’s been stripped from me.

Yet I have to be strong.

Always strong.

I cry at night and in the dark.

So that in the day I’m light and full of false snark.

 

-NR

A Cover…Ou un sale secret

Yeah, you read it correctly.

I’m only saying what other people are thinking.

Of what others are feeling.

What lies within all of us.

What we are afraid to let out.

What’s the worst that could happen?

It’s okay,

I’m like the rest of you.

I’m the coward that pretends to be appalled,

Secretly marveling at the tales being spun.

Does that make me a deviant?

Tu pourrais ĂȘtre rude c’est ce que je veux

Look at me.

An absolute mess because of my thoughts centering you.

-NR