You Still Dream

It’s dark.
I can’t seem to find my mark.
I’ve arrived upon the shark.
Where’s the time?
Surely I’ve not run out of mind?
Could you help me find?
I decline,
Steadily, and with certainty,
I decline.

I need a hand.
Someone whose willing to stand.
Yet I press on.
Foolishly, and with no navigation,
No direction,
No thought out procession,
I press on.

I know,
I have to go.
I have to reach that place,
Where bodies are constantly pressed together.
Feelings that scratch the surface,
Light as a feather.

I need something to keep me warm,
From this incoming storm.
I need that form.
The one that makes me forsake the feelings….

Normal,
Nothing formal is what I should have.
But the abnormal is what keeps me satisfied.
It keeps the beast that lives inside me satiated,
Not feeling emaciated,
incapacitated,
Starving for flesh.
Is this a test?
If so I believe you’ve found my weakness.
You I believe have bested me.

Cheers for finding my fears,
and bringing them up for me to be lost,
to be unclear.

-N

I.L.U.

It makes me feel alive.
It makes me feels things I haven’t felt in such a long time.
I’m a slave to the ink.
I’m adulterous to the blank paper.
I commit all of the seven deadly sins to see the smile,
The look of appreciation on your face.
To see the review you leave in memory,
In my place.
I see space.
Here is my offering.
I hope you take it.
No, don’t hesitate,
take,
Pillage,
Consume.
I do.
I can’t seem to stop.
My God, have I reached the top?
Have I lost my mind?
Where is the time?
Where’s Alice?
She’s normally here to save me from this malice.
Me,
I need it.
I inhale it.
I lay by my bed waiting for more.
More…
Inspiration,
More….
Perspiration,
More….
Motivation,
No condensation.
Breathe
In,
Out.
Eyes closed.
Open,
You’re still here.
My dream.
You haven’t let me down,
You’re always there.
You’re still here.
Keeping me warm and clear.
I’ve never traveled down this road before.
It’s been full of strife and tears.
Will you two disappear?
come to naught?
You get my drift.
I need this lift,
this gift.

-N

Not Looking For Captain Savior….

“It’s cool I got it…” -N

I heard about a girl,
Whose ambition was to be a wife.
Not a lawyer,
Not a doctor,
Not the next person to solve world peace.
But a wife.
Now don’t get me wrong,
A wife has a lot to tackle.
Kids, children, a finicky husband,
You get my drift.
What made this crazy is when asked why she wanted to be a wife,
It wasn’t because she wanted to end strife,
That she had this feeling of giving life,
It was because it would give her a purpose.
As she said this I was mentally stabbing myself with a knife.
Ladies, what are we doing wrong?
I want love,
I want something more than the physical,
something that ascends even the spiritual,
But really?
Laziness!
Anarchy!
Ladies hold up your man-made bras and agree with me!
We have value,
and it’s not measured by how many kids we can produce,
or how quiet we can be for HIM.
Wake up!
Get your mind outta the Nicholas Sparks novel!
please, I grovel before you!
We are suffering,
We need to help each other.
Pull the strength from inside of you.
Yes you.
“Love is not just the verb it’s you looking in the mirror,” Kendrick says.
Are we following these words?
Are we looking to love ourselves first?
I stand here perplexed……
-N

Lost

Life is going by, and
I can’t seem to fly.
This black tie is holding me back.
You see I’m normally so spry.
I lie in, I don’t know
anticipation, for the hard,unforgiving
sensation, condensation, gyration you
provide.
While I’m astride you,
People chide,
give me looks of snide.
Trying to hold back my progress.
But I digress.
My success,
is in the love you possess.
It’s in my feelings in which you
so gladly acquiesce,
address,
to my distressed spirit.
I can’t fly
because I need you here.
Please lend an ear.
Don’t disappear.

-N