Thursday

I can’t share my thoughts.

Sometimes I feel ashamed of my carnal desires.

I smile to hide the tears,

I laugh to ignore the fears.

-N

Foreboding

I should be used to this.

The unknown.

The heart racing,

Hands shaking,

Fear inducing trauma,

That stops me in my tracks.

But every time it happens it feels like the first time.

-N

Predilection

For the decadent,

Sinful, feel of you.

-N

Alter Ego

Go away!

Please stay.

I hate you!

If only you knew how much my heart beats for you!

You make me weak!

I’m so mesmerized by you that I can hardly speak.

You destroyed this!

No, it was my fearful heart that kept me from eternal bliss.

I-

Sorry.

Organ Failure

I no longer aspire to be strong.

The world has taken advantage of that.

I’m emotionally drained.

I’m physically hurt.

I’m easily accessible and overly alert.

The war torn look shows.

Yet, I still compose.

-N

Enervated

…With reason,

Yet I’m too tired to elaborate.

Huh.

A writer exhausted to the point of silent thoughts.

I guess miracles really do happen.

-N

Something Not Poetry.

It is sorrowful to me that high school literature curriculum for most of America, specifically California has not changed. To be frank, it is still very much White. I have been a youth leader and tutor for humanities, history and literature for the past two years and I am appalled at the homework I have been assisting teenagers with. I have students inquiring about #kylahspring or the origins of the #AfricanAmerican people of the diaspora, including the inception of the indegenious people yet teachers are still assigning #CatcherInTheRye or #TheGreatGatsby, which are essentially prejudiced pieces of literature. Indicatively, I have not ascertained one piece of diverse or neoteric work being popularized into their curriculum written by a BIPOC. #America loves to say that it’s changing for the better, yet in many aspects, when it comes to education, we are eons behind the rest of the world. Ultimately, I believe that will be our downfall.

Repose

Time doesn’t exist when I’m with you.

Its endless days of sunshine and moonlight.

My senses are heightened, enlightened, slightly frightened,

By your presence.

I fear waking up.

-N

Winter

I’ve kept my heart sealed,

Air tight so that it wouldn’t take off at the first sign of delight.

But now it’s 6 o’clock and black as midnight, yet you’ve disappeared.

This silence invokes me to violence.

-N

Come & Go

Night fall calls me.

Beckons me with open arms with the promise of more.

Enthralls me with it’s sweet words and-

But it’s temporary.

Like most things this pleasurable feeling is temporary.

-N