An Incurable Romance Writer
I looked up,
And you were there.
I tried to speak,
But you shook your head.
I stepped back.
You walked forward.
“I went too far,” you said.
“I took too much,” you pled.
“I should’ve tried,” you shouted.
I wanted to scream.
I wanted to fight.
Anything but feel this.
This burning in my chest.
This racing heart.
“I lost myself along the way with you,” I spoke quietly.
I walked forward.
You stepped back.
You tried to speak,
But I shook my head.
“No. It’s my turn to speak.”
-NR
I can feel a change coming over me.
I’ve said this before.
I battle with a lot.
This feeling,
This other part of me.
This double life I’m living.
Beautiful one day,
Wrecked the next.
Nothing is enough.
Nothing satisfies me.
There is no limit.
Yeah, you read it correctly.
I’m only saying what other people are thinking.
Of what others are feeling.
What lies within all of us.
What we are afraid to let out.
What’s the worst that could happen?
It’s okay,
I’m like the rest of you.
I’m the coward that pretends to be appalled,
Secretly marveling at the tales being spun.
Does that make me a deviant?
Tu pourrais être rude c’est ce que je veux
Look at me.
An absolute mess because of my thoughts centering you.
-NR
I shouldn’t click but I do.
It’s late,
I can’t keep my thoughts straight.
A song comes on the radio.
I feel that I should go.
Mon esprit me dit toujours non.
You are a drug.
I swear I’ll never go back.
Just one more time.
But then I see your name,
and it’s like a sign.
Times, minds, drawn.
Fate sealed.
I can barely get my thoughts out tonight.
Because what’s promised is more delight.
Is it selfish?
To want to feel this for only me?
To not care about you,
To not care about what anyone else feels.
I want to take,
I never got to before.
I’ve always given,
Put myself on the back burner.
No more.
Not I.
Not again.
I tell you the rules.
Instead of being bothered,
You only smirk.
Glance my way,
And take off your pants.
Draped across the bed,
You tell me to take what’s mine.
We’ve got nothing but time, is what you said.
I have your pleasure,
But only if you take mine.
This has never happened to me before…
-NR
JustNicoleRenee 